Loneliness: A Human Experience and How to Understand It

Loneliness is part of the human experience. Just like joy, happiness, or pleasure, it is a feeling that anyone can experience. It can appear at any stage of life — even in those who seem surrounded by family or friends.

It is important to distinguish between being physically alone and the feeling of loneliness. Loneliness is more related to experiencing emotional disconnection, the feeling that we are not understood or supported. When this state persists, it can affect our psychological wellbeing and mental health overall.

What Do We Mean by Loneliness?

Loneliness often arises when our social relationships do not meet our emotional needs. This can happen when:

• We know many people, but deep connections are missing
• We feel misunderstood or “invisible”
• We have low self-esteem
• We feel lonely even in the middle of a group of people
• We live far from family or our social circle

Often, loneliness is connected to how we perceive ourselves. When the relationship with ourselves is fragile, creating connections with others can become more challenging. However, there are simple and important steps that can make a difference.

Not every approach works the same for everyone. Choose what seems most suitable for you and what you feel comfortable with. If you find it difficult to find the right method, you can consult with a psychologist at Mendje.

1. Share Your Experience with Someone

Talking about loneliness can feel challenging, but it often brings relief. Many people have experienced this feeling, and sharing it can normalise the experience.

It is important to share your experiences with a trustworthy person, in a space where you feel safe and without judgement. In many cases, what brings relief is not necessarily the solution offered, but the experience of being heard, understood, and accepted.

2. Build a Strong Connection with Yourself First

In some cases, strengthening the connection with yourself can be more helpful than expanding your social circle.

Reflect: What does self-care mean to me?

Self-care can take various forms, such as:

• A walk alone
• Preparing a meal
• Creative activities
• Organising your space
• Visiting museums or cultural activities
• Physical movement that makes you feel good

Experiment with patience and self-compassion.

3. Take Small Steps

If this feeling has been present for a long time, change may seem difficult. It is not necessary to make immediate changes. You can start with a simple greeting, a short conversation with a neighbour, or a phone call with someone dear to you.

4. Meet New People

If you feel ready, you can look for new ways to connect with others:

• Online communities based on interests
• Volunteer activities
• Local groups or community initiatives
• Support programmes recommended by professionals

For some people, nature offers a strong sense of connection and calm. Connection does not always mean conversation — sometimes just presence is enough. Creating a routine is extremely important.

5. Do Not Compare Yourself with Anyone

Comparison, especially through social media, can have a very negative impact. Social media often presents only the most beautiful moments of people’s lives. This can create the perception that others are constantly surrounded by company, but reality is always much more complex.

If you notice that social media is negatively affecting your wellbeing, it may be helpful to reduce your usage for a period.

6. Take Care of Your Overall Health

Loneliness can affect both psychological and physical aspects. Some small changes in your daily routine can help:

• Regular physical activity (start with 10 minutes each day and add 5 minutes each week)
• Time in nature
• Interaction with animals
• Planning for emotionally sensitive periods

Even small steps that may seem like “nothing” have a very positive impact on our brain.

7. Consider Professional Support

If loneliness feels persistent or severe, a conversation with a psychologist can offer clarity and concrete strategies. Approaches such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) help in understanding the connection between thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, as well as in developing skills for challenging social situations.

Seeking help is a form of self-care, and you can do this through the Mendje platform, where you can connect with a psychologist specialised in this topic.

A Final Reflection

Loneliness is not a personal failure. It is part of the human experience.

You do not need to change everything immediately. You do not need to become someone else. You do not need to rush.

Start with small steps and show kindness to yourself. Connections are often built quietly and gradually.